Peter

I think I am like Peter.

Peter was willing to step out on the ocean to walk on the water but he started sinking because of fear. 
Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.” “Come,” he said.
   Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” (Matthew 14:28-31)

Peter was so rash and excited to see Jesus on the land that he jumped out of the boat and swam to land! (probably arriving after the boat too lol)"As soon as Simon Peter heard him say, "It is the Lord," he wrapped his outer garment around him (for he had taken it off) and jumped into the water." (John 21:7)

Peter swore to always follow Jesus and yet he denied Him three times.
"Peter asked, "Lord, why can't I follow you now? I will lay down my life for you.Then Jesus answered, "Will you really lay down your life for me? I tell you the truth, before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times!" (John 13:37-38)

Peter told Jesus that he will never let him wash his feet and when he heard Christs reply, Peter was a bit melodramatic in the response.
“No,” said Peter, “you shall never wash my feet.”  Jesus answered, “Unless I wash you, you have no part with me.”  “Then, Lord,” Simon Peter replied, “not just my feet but my hands and my head as well!” (John 13:8-9)

Peter is rash and passionate. He lives and loves with a wild abandon...but because of this abandon there are many times he has "open-mouth-insert-foot" moments. I can relate to this. God knows that I am a starter but not always a finisher. He knows I try to be brave but on the inside I am crying like a little girl. I always promise him that I will love Him but I fall on my face many times. I am not always a good example nor someone to be looked up to but I THANK JESUS that he loves me anyways. Even through all of his "oops" moments Jesus still called him the rock and used him to build the church! God uses me even though I am full of mistakes, rash, emotional, dramatic... because He knows my heart.

When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?”
“Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.”
Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.”
Again Jesus said, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”
He answered, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”
Jesus said, “Take care of my sheep.”
The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”
Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.”
Jesus said, “Feed my sheep. Very truly I tell you, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.”Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. Then he said to him, “Follow me!”   (John 21: 15-19)

If God can do this with Peter, make him the rock of the church. Then why should I be afraid to let Jesus do this with me? He knows I am willing because I surely would be the first one to step out of the boat but only with him will I be able to actually walk. I want to trust Jesus with my ALL. I want to be the one he uses to bring Him glory. I want to reflect all of his goodness and majesty. I want to live flat on my faith in obediance and reverence for the Lord. I want to love the way Jesus loved; endlessly and unconditionally. The only thing that holds me back is fear. Fear that I am not good enough, that I cant do it, that we wont have the money to do it, that I am to ugly to do it (hey, I am honest here), that I...I...I...I... point taken. I need to stop saying "I" and start saying HIM. I shouldnt be telling God how big my problems are; I should be telling my problems how BIG my God is!

New moto: Fear freezes, faith frees.